Where does the time go?

If you stop and think about it, you have just lost precious seconds or minutes that can never be recovered.  I do little to nothing all day and wonder how did things get done back in the day and realized that organization was my salvation.  I planned everything, it is in my nature and I was good at it.  So here are a few hints of things I did that allow me to get a trillion things done.  When the kids were little, I had three of the most amazing ‘baby sitters’, ‘nanny’ or what I called them ‘second Moms’. So to Ceci, Sandra and Marcela, thank you for all the help and a job well done.  These days all three have kids of their own and have done a fantastic job at raising their own.

After my father died, I decided that I needed to spend more time with the children and got a part time job, actually more like 6 hours at the office and sometimes 2 hours from home.  I would take the kids to school, go to the office and then pick them up at 2:30.  That is when the fun began since Michelle was involved in everything, girl scout, swimming, dance, at times soccer, cheerleading and softball and Michael tried T-Ball and soccer but stuck to boy scout, swimming and of course his favorite ‘Karate’. 

I would do one load of laundry every night while we ate dinner.  Monday was whites, Tuesday lights, Wednesday dark, Thursday sheets, Friday towels (which might be folded the next morning), Saturday white/lights, and Sunday darks.  To the best of my abilities, clothes would not stay in the dryer, it was wash, dry, fold and put away the one load each night and most of it took place while other things were getting done.  I had a container in my car that would hold the children uniforms for the after school events so that they could change in the car while going from one place to the next.

For cleaning I tried to have someone clean once a week but there were times when we could not afford it so we did it.  Cleaning would take ½ hour or less a night.  Monday bathrooms, Tuesday kitchen, Wednesday dust down stairs, Thursday change beds and dust upstairs, Friday was always party time, Saturday clean all the floors and Pat would vacuum and Sundays was cooking.

Now for cooking… for a while I had each person give me ideas of 2 meals, that way I had 6 meals planned.  On Sunday, I would go to the store, buy all ingredients and snacks for the week.  Once at home, I would cut up the fruit/vegetable for the lunch bags and place them in Ziploc bags, I would also have the lunch bags made with the drink and snack and the vitamins out for the week so all that needed to be done in the morning was the sandwich and complete assembling the lunch bags.  Keep in mind that every night before going to bed homework had to be done, school bag ready and uniforms for school and Pat and my clothes had to be laying out.  This process was a savings grace as in the morning everyone is always in a hurry and half asleep. 

I would precook on Sundays and freeze as needed.  If one picked pasta, I would make the sauce (enough for at least 4 dinners) and just worry about making the pasta later on.  Meatloaf could also be done ahead of time and only worry about the rice and peas.  The same goes for chili and many soups.  I have a spreadsheet with some of my easy/favorite meals that can be made in huge amounts and freeze so let me know, and I will be happy to forward on.  One rule on the meals was that everyone had to eat what the other had chosen or their particular meal would not be made. 

Gosh I am tired just writing this, now I know why my children said that I was the meanest Mom in town…  on the other hand, they still love me so I hope that some of my advice helps any and all my friends out there… 

FYI, I have open the comment section to anyone who wants to leave a message so no more having to log in to make a comment. 

Love y’all,

ME

Junk

Have you ever seen the sign of a little boy seating down that says ‘I know I am somebody ‘cause God don’t make no junk?’, I have always loved that sign, so much so that I truly believe and practice what it says...  Once there was a young lady assigned to my team as the last chance since didn’t do well on any other job.  It was obvious that she did not belong in a technical environment but she was a good listener and was able to document step by step what the staff was doing… fantastic fit as technical people hate documentation.  My philosophy then and now is that you can’t be good at everything but every person is good at something.  So when you are faced with someone who seems incompetent at their job, just think of it as they are in the wrong place.  No matter what anyone says, everyone likes to be praised so when you find someone doing a great job, tell them, let them know, put a smile on their face.  If it is the other way around, don’t put them down; help people find their strength, gift, what they are good at so that they too can someday be praised for doing a great job.

Now here is another end of that spectrum, when someone does something hurtful.  As a young person, I use to try to hurt back; you’re ugly, fat and smell like a pig.  As a young professional I use to make sure to point out to anyone that would hear me, how bad this person was which in turn create a circle of hate, now how professional was that?  Later I learn to walk away and pretend that person did not exist, but now, today, I am telling you that the best way to handle this (at least for me) is to let the person know that they have hurt you, tell them, they need to know that their actions are hurtful, that you forgive them under the assumption that they did not mean to create a negative outcome and that you hope that they will change that behavior.  If you do not tell them and they do it again to you or maybe even someone more vulnerable, it will only be on you for not saying anything. Will you change them, who knows? but it is worth a try…  Don’t you think?  When they say, ‘don’t talk to strangers’, forget that, tell a child throwing the paper in the trash what a good job that is, and if you see them throwing it on the ground you tell them that it is wrong and ‘let me show you how is done’, pick it up and throw it in the trash.  Simple.

God does not create junk, circumstances changes the beautiful child into what might be considered junk, but God has also given us the power to make it better for us and them…

Thank God for friends

I forgot how much joy is there when you see good old friends.  Friday I wrote about Happy Hour and having a good day and all and never did I dream that our good old friends from Denver (Linda and Charlie) were going to drive 10 hours to come to Norman Oklahoma and surprise me.  It has been an incredible weekend of laughing, crying, catching up and just togetherness.

Unfortunately I also forgot for a moment about my cancer and the treatments and tried to ignore my aching body telling me that something was not right.  Then of course came the fever as a reminder that my defenses were too low.  The good thing is that that was yesterday and today is a new wonderful day. 

So for a short and sweet note, surprise someone today.  Give them a call, send them a text or just show up and knock on their door.  We all need a moment in which to say ‘That was a joy’.

‘And if you are in Orange County California, please go see Michael as he too could use some company’.

Love y’all,

ME

YIPPEE IS FRIDAY!!!

To be honest, I only wrote that in hopes that it will cheer you up because for us retired folks Friday just means that there will be more people out in the stores and public places so we stay home.  Funny how that works, back in the days I just couldn’t wait for Friday.  Before kids it was all about Happy Hour and party over the weekend, be merry, be happy and drink.  Once kids came along, Friday was just the beginning of an always extremely busy weekend with kids, cleaning, laundry, kids, errands, cooking, uniforms, kids, sports, movies, kids; you know what I mean.  Once the kids became teenagers Friday was really a nightmare because it was now them who were going out and you (me) staying awake until they got home.  Okay, no need to make this sound so bad. 

‘CHIN UP IS FRIDAY’ and it will be a good one for you, for me and for all.  Did you know that there are people who can’t see the good in that statement?  Have you ever wonder what makes a negative, miserable person that way?  I have with no answer.  I have also wished that I could change them but I failed there too.  Now don’t get me wrong, I too meet people who are ALWAYS happy and that also makes me wonder. 

Some people believe that they are not negative but just realist and preparing for what is to come.  Some people believe that they are positive because all is good, they love and are loved.

Does this sound like the Black and White syndrome?  What about grey?  Is that a feeling too?

Here is what I do know about me and my feelings, they change each day, and that in my old age I am a huge blob of rainbow colors.  Forget the black, white and grey nothing like tickle pink, pio pio yellow or shallow green beach.  Can I control these feelings?  Yes, but do I?  Nope, although I try because I know I can, I do not always succeed and that is okay.  So here is the deal, choose what you want to feel today, if it is really how you want to feel ‘like happy’ then make it happen all day long, if it is really how you want to feel ‘like miserable’ than give yourself 5 minutes and be done because as much as I love you, feeling miserable is not the way to be, take my word for it.

So, DON’T WORRY, BE HAPPY, YIPPEE IS FRIDAY.

Love y’all,

ME

Prayers for Maggie

Okay friends, tomorrow is when Magnolia Love, my precious granddaughter of 4 ½ months is having the angiogram procedure.  We do not anticipate any problems but look forward to all good news.

This procedure is needed to take pictures of the heart before the open heart surgery in August.  Please pray loads starting around 7:30 am USA Central time for about 3 hours.  I will add to this post as soon as I have information.

FYI, feel free to read my daughters blog ‘Leach Love’ which you can access on the upper right side from my blog. 

God Bless and Love y’all,

ME

ALL WENT WELL, THE PROCEDURE IS OVER.  THEY TOOK ALL THE HEART PICTURES THEY NEEDED FOR NEXT MONTH AND THERE WERE NO BAD SURPRISES SO ALL IS GOO.  MISS MAGGIE IS AT HOME WITH MOM AND DAD. 

Thank y’all for the prayers today and always…  Love y’all,

ME

Blessings

This happened a couple of weeks ago or maybe three but I was not sure on how to share the story as I do not have that many followers and do not want to scare away the few that I have.  Remember, I need you so that I can have a successful journey…  But here it goes.

Along with all the new changes in my life, I have started to exercise in an elliptical that Pat bought (he hardly uses it).  While exercising, I continued with my daily prayers mostly the rosary and noticed for the first time that the picture on the wall had actually a church, then I look to the left and the next and realized that all the german prints that Pat bought long ago (before we were married) actually had a church and wondered what kind of statue did they have for Mary?

I closed my eyes and a beautiful young lady simply dressed in shiny white reached over the back of my neck and pulled my 1cm tumor, gone just like that.  I believe it was Mary, I know it was Mary sent by God to help me out… One tumor at a time (sorry Michael).  During my last visit, Doctor Thorp asked me about my pain on my lower back and neck and I told her that the one in the neck was gone.  She looked and touched and opened her eyes and said, well, the chemo must be working.  I smiled.

As I said, this happened a few weeks ago and I shared it with very few people, maybe only Michelle and she wanted to convince me that if I did not see the face then maybe it was God himself or an angel, but I know it was Mary. 

I am sharing this with you today because in case that you believe, please pray that Mary comes back and takes the other tumors.  Pray that Jesus stands by the doctors next week when Maggie goes in for the angiogram.  And PRAY that God listens to Michaels prayers for strength. 

Now if you don’t believe, then pray because you are my friend and I need your prayer and energy and positive thinking.

And if the tumor is not gone, well then for now I am happy and each happy moment kills one cancer cell at a time…  All good.

Love y’all,
ME

I’ll be darn

Here I thought I knew a lot about the do’s and don’ts of day to day life with cancer and boy was I surprised.  First of all, one of the remedies I was taking was ‘Apple Cider Vinegar RAW’ and my doctor rolled her eyes.  They had told me to stop taking it and I just assumed that it was during the period when my white cell counts were low in case it had bacteria… well no, it is forever.  Amanda, please tell your Mom “Sorry Gayle S., I tried.”

Also to my surprise I have to put in this category all fruits and vegetables that can’t be peeled or boiled to death.  Why?  Because by day 14^th when my white cell count is up, it needs to stay up for the next round of chemo and can’t be fooling around with bacteria…  So lettuce, grapes, potato skins… all bye, bye…  Another reason is that as time passes my white/red cells will NOT regenerate as fast as they should do to the prolonged chemo.  Thanks to Randy V. I should be okay because he showed me yesterday an ‘ancient Chinese’ exercise that will help stimulate the white/red cell growth.  Did I tell you that Cancer sucks?

I also re-remember something I wanted to bring to your attention, have you noticed how most medical providers (nurses, doctors, receptionist…) are on the very heavy side?  Not just a bit chubby but ‘HEAVY’ well, as it turns out, it is our fault ‘the patient’ because as a sign of gratitude we bring them food, mostly sweets like donuts, cake, cookies… as they help us, we need to help them so let us start a new trend and bring a thank you card, funky socks, pens (they always loose theirs) no balloons because of oxygen tanks and no flowers because of bacteria, gift card to Starbucks or Target… How about that for an idea?

Well not much to write as I need to finish my daily prayers and move around to forget that I just got chemo…  And talking about prayers, please remember to pray for Michael as he needs strength to continue making it at the center and for Miss Magnolia the Great who is scheduled for the angiogram next Wednesday…  and and and for a cure for cancer.

Long live Harry Potter

Love y’all,

ME

Food

It is all about cancer.  Did I tell you that the only thing I am not ashamed to say ‘I hate’ is cancer?  I HATE CANCER.  This week they will put in a permanent port so that they can give all the chemo they want.  Thursday is chemo day.

Knowledge transfer 1: When you have chemo, and as much as I have, your veins are shot.  The port is connected to the vein underneath the skin this way they only poke you once (into the port) and not seven times to get blood or give chemo.  Wednesday is port day.

Knowledge transfer 2: I get a shot of Neulasta the next day after chemo which cost about $6,845.  Thank God and the military for insurance.  This medicine helps boost the white cells which are destroyed by the chemo.  Between day 4 and 10 the white cell count goes down to nothing (neutropenia).  It is not built back to a healthy state until day 14.  During this time, the risk of infection is very high and without defenses the results could be deadly.  So if you have a friend going through chemo, remember the danger during this period and do not go visit them if you have a remote possibility of having a cold or flu, wash your hands as soon as you walk in the door, no fresh flowers and no fruit or vegetable that can’t be boiled or even fresh pepper.

Knowledge transfer 3: Several years ago, my family was very close to the Society Devoted to the Sacred Heart Sisters and the founder ‘Sister Ida’ was fighting cancer.  Sometimes when she would go in for chemo, I would make a big pot of Venezuelan Black Beans because the taste is what she needed.  I did not understand the concept then, but do now.  Another anomaly that happens in the two weeks of chemo is that your taste buds going down the drain and so does your cooking.  Last round of chemo, I had to throw away pasta… can you imagine messing up spaghetti?  So if you go and visit a friend that is going through chemo, bring homemade tasty food, no sweets remember ‘cancer loves sugar’. 

With this said/written, I need to finish this up, head to the store and spend the next two days cooking spaghetti sauce, sloppy Joes, chili, shredded beef and the broccoli soup recipe that Dave put in my blog.

Love y’all,

ME 

CANCER LOVES STRESS, ANGER CAUSES STREES therefore CANCER LOVES ANGER

Okay so the last blog didn’t do much for you did it?  No one likes to be told to eat healthy, or stop/reduce alcohol or sweet drinks like sodas.  I was not saying that you have to, just recommending that you should start so that it is not as difficult as it has been for me. 

Shshhhhh, I got the cold shoulder treatment on that one.  You might want to go back to that blog because my one and only comment from Dave is actually a pretty good recipe.

Well, not sure if this blog will be any better as I mentioned on my last blog about changes and one of the things I briefly mentioned was forgiveness. 

Remember, ‘CANCER LOVES STRESS’ and ‘ANGER CAUSES STRESS’ therefore ‘CANCER LOVES ANGER’.  I use to be the worst at forgiving and probably still am to an extent.  They should have made me a crown for being the queen of ‘holding grudges’, in some cases for years.  But as life goes on and you start analyzing situations then you realize that not all the people that made you angry did it on purpose, and when you are in my situation, it is even less relevant spending time being angry. 

Anger is usually caused by someone because they hurt you, either directly or indirectly and while you hurt, the word forgiveness is almost impossible to even pronounce.  Some people hurt you because they are plain mean but fortunately enough these type of people are few, the ‘devil-made-them’ do it.  Most of the people that hurt you did not really mean to do it; sometimes you even caused it yourself.  

So here is my knowledge transfer: There are big pains and little pains, do not dwell on the little pains regardless of who caused them, it is not worth it specially if that makes one cancer cell laugh… nope, if possible let the person know that their action was hurtful in hopes that they do not do it again, take a deep breath or say a prayer, forgive them and move on. If you can’t tell them, then still take a deep breath or say a prayer, forgive them and move on.  If the pain caused is big, the kind that won’t let you sleep at night, then you have to sort it out and fast.  My Dad use to say, “there are two types of problems, the ones that you can fix so go do it and the ones that are out-of-your-control so learn to live with them” , do your best to fix the problem and release the pain and forgive the person, if nothing else so that you can sleep.  And of course, take many deep breaths or say loads of prayers for them and for you. 

Now what to do with the ones you can’t fix or the big ones caused by mean people…  Here is what I have done, ‘turn it over to God’ and if that is not you then take ‘gigantic breath/meditate/go for a run’ and set them aside, pretend the person does not exist, remove them from your day to day life.  Once the pain has subsided… then analyze the situation, you will be surprised that when you break it down into pieces, there are many problems that you can fix and you can learn to live with what is left.  

It is at this point when you forgive, pray or meditate and move on.

My wish for you today is that you are the one forgiving and not the one needing forgiveness.

Love yah,

ME  

Good vs. Bad

Why is it so easy to be bad and so hard to be good?  This statement can apply to many things but today I am referring to eating and drinking.  I always had some of the worst eating and drinking habits of anyone.  For over 15 years I ate 3.2 pounds of peanut M&M a week for breakfast and lunch, I drank at least 2 rum&pepsi's a night and smoked cigarettes.  At the time, I was so proud of never getting sick and I would tell people “When germs come into my body they would say, there is nothing left and leave”, so I never got colds, stomach flu or anything…that is until I got this thing called cancer. 

Now, I am trying real hard to be good, I stopped eating M&M in 2005 and stopped smoking in February of 2009.  I can’t remember when was the last time I had a rum&pepsi or even a Cosmo.  Mostly staying away from alcohol because of the sugar, remember as I said before “sugar does not cause cancer but if you have cancer, it feeds from sugar”.  Water to me is disgusting, I have a new water filter thanks to ‘Robert L. Ewing, Inc./Shaklee’ and it makes it a bit better but I still have to put some fresh squeezed lemon and ‘xylitol’ instead of sugar.  Fresh fruit juice is pretty good but it needs to be fresh and can’t have it between days 4 to 14 from chemo because of bacteria.  When you are going through chemo, your white cell count goes down and you are not able to fight bacteria of any kind so fruit and vegetables, even organic is a big NO unless you can boil the life out or it.

Talking about organic, yes I am trying that too.  My goal is to start buying organic as my current food supply runs out, but some of that stuff is hard to swallow.  Again, I am trying but I can taste the organic green bell peppers and they are not good.  The organic meet and chicken is very expensive, so far I have not had to buy it since my supply was pretty big.  Hopefully when is  time to buy more meet or chicken, my palate has gotten use to the organic vegetables.  In the meantime, we do eat and enjoy ‘wild fish’.

And finally here come the pills and other medications.  Back in the days, a multivitamin was all we took, now I take extra vitamins that my ‘over 55 multivitamin’ lacks, such as A, E, C, Be…, plus breast cancer pill, plus pills to soften effects of the chemo, plus my alternative medicines like the Essiac Tea (which does taste like dirt) and the  Aloe+honey.  In total about 16 in the morning and another 6 in the evening.

Please know that eating and drinking healthy is not a guarantee that you will not have an illness.  So the ‘knowledge transfer’ is, start eating and drinking healthy today so that it is easier to go from ‘bad habits’ to ‘good habits’ when you have no other choice.  Once you have conquer this, then you can start applying the ‘bad-to-good’ life changing event to other cases such as judging others, or bad language, or even forgiveness…

Be good today and every day, just saying.

Love y’all

ME

Independence Day - July 4th and July 5th

Monday is the Fourth of July or Independence Day of the United States of America.  The blog today will be dedicated to our military.  To ALL of them, thank you from the bottom of my heart.  It does not matter whether you are in the Air Force, Army, Navy, Marines or Reserves, active duty or retired, it is thanks to you that I am able to write this message, that I am free to pray every day, that I can go shopping, see my family and friends.  It is thanks to you that I can be me.

May God bless you every day; I pray that you are safe, that your sacrifice is rewarded and that your family is protected. 

If you are like me that wish to support them, there are a few things you can do, starting with a prayer.  We all know someone who knows someone who is out there in the middle of it all, so put together a care package with things like a deck of cards, dices, or a ball, maybe even beef jerky.  These are items that do not require electricity or maintenance and fit in their pockets, and if you use the prepaid boxes from the postal office it is less than $10.00.  During girl scouts cookie sale, you can buy extra boxes and they will ship them for you.  There is also a need for their families left behind.  If you live close to a military base, you can go and inquire. 

As you go on with your weekend, please bow your head for our military and then go eat, drink and be merry and be safe.

 
Tuesday is the Fifth of July or Independence Day of Venezuela.  The blog today will also be dedicated to my family and friends who still live there and the ones that had to escape for a safer life.  It is hard to celebrate Independence Day when you are not free.  My heart goes out to you and my prayer to God is that he will bless you, I pray that you stay safe and that soon your sacrifice is rewarded with a new DEMOCRATIC leader that will fix the country so that I can come and visit.
 
Today, now and every day, I pray for world peace and I ask God to give me the wisdom to start with myself.

Love y’all,

ME