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I am starting my third battle with cancer and I would like if you travel with me ...

Saturday, May 12, 2012

Resting in Peace

It is with a heavy heart that I share my mom met Jesus this morning. Our last real conversation with her was Tuesday and she was resting until she died. Please forgive us if we missed personally telling anyone. Thank you for all the support and love we've received from you these last days, weeks, months and years.

Thursday, May 10, 2012

5/8 - 5/10

5/8- Was my Dad's birthday.  We got to celebrate him at night with pizza, salad and key lime pie.  Tuesday my mom was pretty out of it.  We weren't really sure if it was the medicine she had taken, or just her body declining, but Tuesday was a hard day.

The hospice nurse came and explained that we are transition from a bus to a bike.  What she meant was, for the last 3 years, we've been on a bus barreling towards remission and trying everything... chemo, radiation, surgery, not eating fresh fruit and salads, and various forms of treatment.  Now we're on a bike and my mom is the driver.  Our goal is to just make her comfortable, not necessarily fix something that is wrong.

My brother came home late Tuesday night and discovered my mom standing up alone in the kitchen.  He flipped on the light and guided her back to bed but did not feel comfortable leaving her alone, so he slept in the living room, what an angel.

I woke up around 2 a.m. and was worried to go check on my mom but knew I should.  When I came out I could hear my mom and brother snoring in unison.

5/9- I woke up early and as I walked into the living room, my mom raised both arms up and waved at me. A good sign.  I started taking her vitals and she had definitely improved since Tuesday.  My mom was wanting to walk around and did a few laps around the kitchen.

My dad's cousin's Pam and John arrived from North Carolina and fixed us a great meal.  My mom even ate some of it and some of my step-mother in law's fruit pudding.

5/10- My brother slept in the living room with my mom again and said she had a pretty peaceful night.  Throughout the whole morning, she has slept.  My dad and I were able to convince her to go to the bathroom, but other then that, she's been sleeping.

Just still praying for peace for her.  Thanks for all the love and support we've received.  We've been passing along messages.  She is no longer checking facebook or her blog but we will verbally give her messages as they're sent.

Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Quick Update

This is Michelle.  My mom still hasn't given me permission to write on her blog, but we've been getting lots of requests for updates.  (She'd probably tell you that I'm going to be in trouble and that when she dies she'll come back and pull my toes.  I'll risk it.)


Thursday (5/3)- My mom was admitted to Norman Regional in order to get a CT scan to check for Superior vena cava.  Her doctor was afraid she had a restriction on her throat.  My mom's neck was extremely swollen and so symptoms appeared to match.  They kept her overnight.


Friday (5/4)- My mom's oncologist, Dr. Thorp came in and mentioned my mom was neutropenic.  That means, her white blood cell count is too low and she is at a great chance for an infection.  If she gets an infection, she has no defenses to fight it.  This was a result of the chemo she had Monday (4/30).  Since my mom had tumors that had been new and growing since she came back from MD Anderson and had started chemo here in Norman (4/9), Dr. Thorp said she felt we were going in the wrong direction and that chemo wasn't the right treatment.  However, there really wasn't any treatment available and Dr. Thorp was sending her home.  Devastating news, obviously.  


We asked if she could travel, the Dr. said no and that anyone who wanted to say goodbye should probably come to visit.  She didn't give us a time frame.


As my mom was being wheeled out she told her transporter he was selfish for being fat and smoking.  She said if he didn't go on a diet one day a week she would come back when she died and pull his toes.  


All of my mom's sister's flew in that night.


Saturday (5/5)- My mom woke up with a 103 fever.  It took my dad and I a little bit of time to get our acts together to realize what was going on, but pretty soon we had our routines with medicine and food and liquids.  Saturday ended up pretty good.  The pastors from our church came and prayed with her, and we spent the rest of the day together.  After everyone left my dad asked my mom what the highlight of her day was, so they got to process their day together.


Sunday (5/6)- My mom started out with a fever again.  She's really out of it when she has a fever.  (So we are starting to realize we need to send her to bed with IB Profen so we can prevent this)  After we got her fever under control, she was more like herself.  I think this is the day she had ice cream for breakfast and dinner.  We all watched her favorite shows together as a big family.  After everyone left this night, she piddled around her kitchen and cleaned her counters down, organized piles.  Only my mom would be bothered by a dirty kitchen.  


Monday (5/7)- I woke up around 7:20 and my mom was already up, changed outfits and washing dishes in the sink.  Crazy, but that's my mom.  She was peppy and energetic even (I think the IB Profen before bed helped as she did not have a fever this day).  This was the last day all her sisters were around.  She did really good but you could tell was a little more tired since she had her energy bursts in the morning.  Everyone left after dinner (and I must compliment the chef, my Uncle Bob made pork tenderloin, creamed spinach and mashed potatoes, yum!)  Around 10 p.m. my mom started having pretty rough coughing spells but seemed under control after some meds and slept soundly.


Tuesday (5/8)- TODAY is my dad's birthday!  My mom is still coughing a lot, and we are keeping the fever at bay with more IB Profen.  A hospice nurse should be stopping by soon while all the boys are out running errands.  More to update you on later, but I wanted to give everyone an update.

Thursday, May 3, 2012

Guest Blogging for my Mom



I always feel like a blog has "made it" so to speak in the blogging world when they are popular enough to acquire a guest blogger.  So I'm just helping my mom's blog "make it big" in the blog world I suppose.  I'm sure I'm not doing this how she would, but it's been a long day so bare with me :)



My mom spiked a fever last night, called the emergency line and was immediately prescribed some antibiotics with the understanding that she would check in this morning for a blood check.


As I understand it, she went to her doctor this morning to check in for a blood test and was then sent to the hospital for a CT scan.  (This process took several hours, which she was unable to eat or drink anything, so when I showed up in the timeline she was really feisty.  She complained to the tech doing the scan and he held her hand and comforted her through the whole thing.  A redeeming factor somewhat but she was still super hungry).


The concern is that she's developed severe vena cava.  What the heck does that mean?  I googled it and read from this website.  Who knows if it's helpful or not, it helped me in the moment to read about it.  From what we understand, it could be a tumor pressing on her esophagus preventing her from swallowing and even breathing.  Laying flat last night was one of the worst things she could have done because it prevented her from breathing.  So a sleepless night for my mom and dad.


We are still unsure at this point if her fever is a symptom of this syndrome, or an infection, so she's on antibiotics just in case.


They will be keeping her overnight and she will have a consult with her oncologist in the morning on the CT scan taken today.


She asks for lots and lots of prayers.  Prayers for a good night sleep and for the swelling to go down.


Just to share a quick sweet moment, she had difficulty eating dinner and requested all liquids.  She got cream of chicken soup and boost (like ensure).  Which to me sounded and looked gross.  She looked so excited and was so thankful for it.  Love that she has the most positive perspective always.
And since she always includes pictures.  Here's one of two of her loves at the recent music festival.

Tuesday, May 1, 2012

Latest update from chemo appointment

I would love nothing more than to report positive news, something for my readers to hang onto specially if they or a love one is going through similar situation, but today that is not the case so back to the reality that I have cancer, that it is in its third mutation, that it is very aggressive and that it is deadly.

My tumors are popping out my body, not common but it happens (of course me), I have about 10 that can be seen/monitored with the necked eye and does not need the assistance of a machine or another person, basically my neck looks like Frankenstein.  So after my first chemo April 9th, the tumors had stopped growing which was great news but I noticed last Friday a small change and in fact they have started growing.  The plan now is to have a CT scan on May 11th (since I had my second one yesterday) and plan for chemo every two weeks starting May 14th for as long as my body and blood can take it, sadly I can tell you that it will not because as it is, I am very weak and having a hard time getting up and down.

Another unfortunate news is that there is a possibility that my loss of voice is caused by a tumor pressing in the voice box.  I am of the opinion not to do surgery that is not for saving my life, but I have the right to change my mind a thousand times.  We will see what the scan shows.

And then as if it was not enough, my doctor basically said that I should not drive again.  I was told by the radiation specialist not to drive for concern on seizures, and now they say that with that and my weakness and some of the medication that I am taking to keep me comfortable are not suitable for someone to drive.  This one hurts because no one wants to lose the little independence that they have at 56, but then again, nothing like have a chuffer…  Oklahoma friends, I need a ride to go shopping.

Well, I was hoping to get a new cute picture of some sort and it does not look like I have anything new so here you will see me and my bald head.

To end on a positive note, mostly because I dislike bad news so with the bad must come the good… Pat and Kathy Byrne (thanks a million Kathy, I love them) bought me some amazing BIG earrings to distract from the baldness, Michelle got me some amazing silk bandanas and head bands, and they make me feel pretty and if I am pretty, the world is pretty.  Another positive influence is that I have my neighbor from Colorado here (Linda Talley) working, working, working in my kitchen preparing food and cleaning, yum, yum.  She leaves tomorrow and will give me a few days to get some paper work done before my sister Lisa arrives next week.

So you see, life is not as bad as I indicated above.  Please feel free to call, I know it is hard to hear me, but I love to hear from all of you.

PS. Remember to pray for my son Michael and if you have time, check my daughters blog 'leach love' to see pictures of my beautiful granddaughter.

Love y’all,
ME

Sunday, April 29, 2012

The little things

Sometimes is about the little things that bother you, and then, how silly.  Last night was one of those where there were several little things not making me feel well but not one big one that I could say take this or that and be done.  Well, actually I did start out by taking a pain pill just because I was feeling weird, then another and then still feeling weird I decide to take a deep breath and analyze the situation.

As it turned out, I ate too much between dinner and one of the best cakes I have ever tasted (thank you Mary Ann Dimery), should have waited but didn’t and just flat out pigged out and now I was not feeling well.  The solution an acid indigestion, got better, then a Tums and another Tums and about number 5, problem solved.

Then I had a headache, small one between my eyes, the pain pill wasn’t taking it away, man what to do now, it was the weather pressure, we were getting a storm, a cold water rag did the trick for a while.  Nice.

At the same time my nose was hurting, funny pain I know, but what to do.  Hmmm, nose spray with sailing and humidify the area and problem solved.

By this time, the adrenal gland on the right was acting up, so another pain pill and I slept in the most comfortable recliner chair that we have ‘my throne’. 

Guess what, I am feeling golden today.

So the moral of my story is that when you are faced with an awkward feeling, instead of going for the big guns ‘Pain Killers’, divide and conquer your problem into small pieces to solve the problem.

Love y’all,
ME

Thursday, April 26, 2012

Blog, blog, blog…



Well hello there, hope you have a wonderful day, I hope I do to.  So not much to report just can’t sleep and thought you might want to hear about my continued blessing… Or not, but here they are…

A couple of days ago, we had one of the sweetest memorial services for my mother-in-law Alma Louise (Gal) Washburn Keating.  As you read in my prior blogs…. Or not, she passed last Friday and no matter how you plan and prepare, we miss her.  We expected to have about 10 people or so telling stories but my goodness, we have over 30 people paying their respects and I am so glad for her and Pat.  After the service, Pat’s nephew, wife, baby and mother, came home with us and spent the night.  The pictures that you see here are fantastic, AND YES I AM BOLD… specially the one of the two Grandmas’…  Grandma Gal would have been proud of the two beautiful ‘Great Granddaughters’.

You might say okay, but trust me, what a blessed day and so peaceful and beautiful…

Now get this, while here we get a call from some old friends ‘The Nymans’ flying cross country want to stop by for a night and say hello… they were originally friends with my brother-in-law John and his wife Sonia who is at my house, so we had a party and they got to visit too, coincidence?  Hmmm

And get this, tomorrow Friday, my dear friend ‘Kathy Byrne’ is coming for a night to visit, love chatting with her, she makes me laugh…. And that is not all, I got a call from my Colorado old neighbors, Linda and Charlie Talley and they are driving through, he continues to Louisiana and she will stay with me to spoil me, cook for me, and of course make me laugh too.

Okay so if these are not just all blessing, I do not know what else to call them.  My fear is that one day people will stop coming and then what…  Oh my, can’t think of that now.

Two more radiation and that is it for the brain as my body is saturated and can’t get anymore.  Chemo on Monday and then?  Can’t think about that either, if I tolerate this round we might make plans for a trip after Michael’s next court case.  That would be fun.

Love y’all,
ME